Inspired by the Mad Magazine reading book parodies, these humor pieces will provide the reader with education as well as entertainment.

6. THE MOVIES

6.1. The Movie Crew

It takes many people to make a movie.
This is the "set" of a movie.
Can you see the star of the movie?
He's the guy surrounded by his assistants
and the director's assistants
and the scriptwriters
and the make-up artists
and the stunt doubles
and the special-effects people
and the costumers
and the construction crew
and the animal wranglers
and the trained animals
and the extras
and the catering crew.
It's amazing that it takes so many people
to make one man look good in a movie.
But he's paid more than the whole movie crew
taken toghether.
Why is the star paid so much more than the crew?
Because he's got real talent
for finding good plastic surgeons
and sleeping with the right people.

6.2. The Actress

It is not easy being in the movies.
Just ask the actress.
She's always being asked to "look sexy"
and to take her clothes off for the camera.
But when she gets old
no one asks her to take off her clothes.
That's when she has to become a "serious actress."
What if it were the other way around?
Then we'd see movies full of naked old ladies
and young women doing Shakespeare plays
with their clothes on.

6.3. Geeks

See the movie geek.
It's not an insult - he calls himself that.
He's heavier than a motorcycle.
When he goes to the movies he takes up two seats.
He spends all his time using the Internet
when he's not sitting in a cinema.
Why does the geek love going to the cinema?
Well, it's a hobby.
Some people collect stamps...
...other people collect hemhorroids.

6.4. Producers

Yes, it takes many people to make a movie
but the Producer is the boss of them all.
Boss, boss, boss.
He gets them the money to make the movie.
The Producer is interested in merchandising.
Merchandise, merchandise, merchandise.
Such as DVDs,
toys,
games,
books,
brand-name products appearing in the movie,
and TV spinoffs.
The Producer would in fact prefer
if he could just sell all that stuff
and skip the movie.
But the closest he'll ever get
to merchandise without a movie
is the latest James Bond movie.

(NEXT CHAPTER)

(Previous chapter)

"A.R.Yngve's READING BOOK" is (c)A.R.Yngve 2003. All rights reserved. May not be reproduced without permission.

(To MAIN INDEX)